I got chris browned last night
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
