dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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