May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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