Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Randomize
