break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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