She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
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