Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
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