just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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