I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Randomize
