You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
