apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
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