So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Dicks are not precious.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
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