I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
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