At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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