the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
it was like eating out sand paper
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Oh and itโs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ๐๐๐๐ฌ๐ณ๐
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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