brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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