HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
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