We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Randomize
