I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Randomize