Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize