There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
