how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
