So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Randomize
