census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
i just sent this text using only my big toe
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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