haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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