the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Randomize
