ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Randomize
