Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
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