i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
