Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
