Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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