Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
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