Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
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