Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
