Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves