Texts From Last Night

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  (313): View more from Michigan

  mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!

  (1-313): View more from Michigan

  it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...

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  (313): mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up! (1-313): it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me... http://tfl.nu/s17x
  Replies (13) Good night (990) Bad night (2044)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.

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  (512): I'm so hungover that the internet is hard. http://tfl.nu/0l8c
  Replies (17) Good night (4209) Bad night (1260)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?

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  (240): He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half? http://tfl.nu/4690
  Replies (48) Good night (4285) Bad night (1561)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog

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  (860): That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog http://tfl.nu/ckju
  Replies (6) Good night (1399) Bad night (3113)
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  (415): View more from California

  I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.

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  (415): I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice. http://tfl.nu/3g7h
  Replies (13) Good night (3184) Bad night (998)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...

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  (970): No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand... http://tfl.nu/1d8q
  Replies (10) Good night (915) Bad night (5027)
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  (209): View more from California

  I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.

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  (209): I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that. http://tfl.nu/8ygm
  Replies (3) Good night (2517) Bad night (983)
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  (260): View more from Indiana

  His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.

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  (260): His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too. http://tfl.nu/ej6j
  Replies (8) Good night (4866) Bad night (1069)
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.

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  (307): I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it. http://tfl.nu/zamd
  Replies (2) Good night (1564) Bad night (672)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.

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  (703): I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face. http://tfl.nu/cgkz
  Replies (16) Good night (777) Bad night (2904)
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  (912): View more from Georgia

  Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions

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  (912): Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions http://tfl.nu/6v32
  Replies (3) Good night (1644) Bad night (735)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room

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  (513): Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room http://tfl.nu/wjdc
  Replies (4) Good night (1264) Bad night (528)
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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.

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  (605): The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet. http://tfl.nu/kmib
  Replies (12) Good night (3455) Bad night (631)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.

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  (920): He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level. http://tfl.nu/rkz6
  Replies (1) Good night (549) Bad night (326)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.

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  (617): I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final. http://tfl.nu/105u
  Replies (0) Good night (769) Bad night (390)

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