mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
