areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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