You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Randomize
