I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
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