The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I'm determined to sit on that face.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Randomize
