Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Randomize
