I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
wow bdsm is so cute
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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