Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time

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  (248): god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time http://tfl.nu/psyk
  Replies (10) Good night (1370) Bad night (761)
• Favorite

  (269): View more from Michigan

  butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it

  (734): View more from Michigan

  Thanks?

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  (269): butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it (734): Thanks? http://tfl.nu/zk2g
  Replies (7) Good night (1318) Bad night (767)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.

  (1-301): View more from Maryland

  I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.

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  (301): Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me. (1-301): I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom. http://tfl.nu/1oh9
  Replies (39) Good night (3360) Bad night (813)
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally

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  (281): My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally http://tfl.nu/8k7h
  Replies (30) Good night (972) Bad night (4304)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?

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  (404): Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them? http://tfl.nu/hlb3
  Replies (38) Good night (853) Bad night (7189)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.

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  (631): there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be. http://tfl.nu/ag4a
  Replies (12) Good night (4424) Bad night (1794)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  The Swedes wanted a tensome.

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  (832): The Swedes wanted a tensome. http://tfl.nu/8c8i
  Replies (19) Good night (5612) Bad night (1122)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  There r osticjed everywhere

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  (248): There r osticjed everywhere http://tfl.nu/gpnb
  Replies (12) Good night (1900) Bad night (1224)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.

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  (707): It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know. http://tfl.nu/9rsw
  Replies (20) Good night (1690) Bad night (683)
• Favorite

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.

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  (337): Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned. http://tfl.nu/yn2t
  Replies (7) Good night (1485) Bad night (947)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?

  (647): View more from Ontario

  Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.

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  (416): arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house? (647): Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me. http://tfl.nu/yck0
  Replies (5) Good night (2034) Bad night (489)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  These people don't understand my stages of drunk

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  (850): These people don't understand my stages of drunk http://tfl.nu/g6eb
  Replies (2) Good night (559) Bad night (350)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO

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  (716): Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO http://tfl.nu/9nqy
  Replies (2) Good night (568) Bad night (391)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.

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  (989): I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up. http://tfl.nu/5evh
  Replies (2) Good night (615) Bad night (296)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.

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  (423): Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice. http://tfl.nu/2u0l
  Replies (5) Good night (620) Bad night (186)

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