Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
