i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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