Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
