I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize