So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
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