whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
you didnt know i had herpes?
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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