Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
