After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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