There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
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